Game of divans

If you walk (or you try to walk) in Kuwait and you pay attention to the entrances of the houses, you will discover that sometimes there are some divans forming an inverted U. Here is where Kuwaitis gather together to celebrate one of the most entrenched costumes in the country, representing one of the main pillars of socialization and communication. It is the called “diwaniya”, a gathering sometimes about political and social topics, or merely to spend time chatting, eating and drinking tea in a relaxed atmosphere.

The diwaniyas can be both private (among closed groups of friends or relatives) or public, where everyone can participate and give some opinions. In this case, people discuss generally political topics, like a small citizen’s assembly, providing active participation for the people. They are especially active during election periods. This kind of meetings are a good examples of the level of freedom of speech existing in Kuwait, with more democratic participation than other countries in this area.

 

Tea and sweets, always there

According to what I heard, it is not usual that a foreigner can be invited to participate in a private diwaniya, although it is normally possible to join to any public one, as long as the language is not an obstacle. I already commented in another post that AWARE association organizes discussions every Tuesday, mainly for foreigners in Kuwait, where a moderator holds a debate in English around several topics related to cultural exchange between Western and Arab culture. In these events, not only you can learn interesting information, but they are also a good opportunity to meet new people, something which is not very easy in this place as we already know.

I am glad to know that traditions like this one are being kept, with debates promoting the dialogue, the understanding of other realities and the critical thinking, in this World where people tend more and more to criticize with resentment and without any base, from the anonymity of social media. We have to go out more, knowing, discovering and experimenting and, if it is possible, debating with other people face to face, with empathy and without blind hatred. It is a way to improve somehow the coming prospect we will need to face. 

In great shape

Kuwaitis have a reputation for being people who tend to be sedentary, who do almost everything from their cars or their sofas, and whose habits don’t fit exactly in what we can called a healthy life. However, actually there are all kind of sport clubs around the city and it is possible to see many locals keen to exercise, especially in this period of the year, when the perfect temperatures for going out to burn some calories.

Apart of plenty of gyms and swimming pools, you can find many sport facilities in Kuwait to practice any kind of sport. In my neighborhood, for example, there are a couple of football fields, which you can rent for hours, and outdoor basketball and volleyball courts, near to the beach. For those who can afford it, there are also multiple options for practicing water sports, such as sailing, yachting or scuba diving in some coastal areas.

But, undoubtedly, my most motivating sport and the one which became one of my main hobbies, is running. I always try to find time to have a short race, one of the few funny things I can do in the area where I live. Now in Kuwait there are several running races, such as the Run Kuwait or the Gulf Bank G42 marathon, just last Saturday. I could participate in both in the 10 km. It was very good actually and it is not only a sport event, but also a opportunity for socializing and having fun outdoor, something that in this country is not very usual, beyond the families who go for picnic on the beach.

I am keeping running and I hope I can find more chances to participate in a race. As I said, it is one of the few activities in which I could socialize since I am here, and it also keep me motivated enough to continue living here. Is someone joining next time?

Shall we meet?

Before coming to Kuwait I spent some time investigating in Internet about the pros and cons of this place. One of the most usual complaints among other foreigners who already lived here was the difficulty of making friends and socializing. There was all kind of people, of course, but most of them lament their small social circle and the lack of opportunities of leisure. I didn’t think it could be so frustrating but, after some weeks, all these opinions started to be confirmed. I don’t know if it is because of personal or situational reasons but, among all the countries I have been, this is the one where I am finding more complicated to find persons who I can call friends.

Starting with my personal circumstances, I don’t think that living in a neighborhood like Fintas, far from all kind of center of leisure and socialization, can make it easy if I want to know and meet new people. I already commented in other post that this country is made for vehicles, not for persons, and moving from one side to other is very tired because it is very time consuming. This is by the way other of the factors which hinder meeting someone: the lack of time. I have a very busy schedule and, if I add the master I started two weeks ago, I almost don’t have hours left. But anyway, every weekend I seize the opportunity to go out and do something else than working and studying.

Seaside in Salmiya, where almost every Friday go for running

Other intrapersonal factor, which also affects to many migrants in any other country, is the continuous wheel of farewells and bye byes. People who have been for a long time out of their countries tend to be exposed to this situation very often. Kuwait is not one of those countries where people stay too long, and most of the persons come here for a short period and they leave as soon as they can (there are obviously some exceptions, but this is like that at least for those who come alone). This implies that there is people who don’t want to get involved so much in a friendship, because they don’t want to experience again the same situation. In my case, I must admit that I feel something similar and, after so many years traveling around, I still couldn’t normalize these “mourning” processes when I have to leave my beloved friends behind. But that doesn’t stop my wishes to socialize and make friends as something paramount whenever I go.

Talking now about external factors, totally out of my control, I would start for the usual profile of foreigner coming to this country. It is still early to make a precise description but, according to other comments I read in social media and conversations with other expats, I see there are many people who come here merely because they want to make money, without caring about social life at all. These are individuals who focus only on their work and they even use their free time to do extra hours in any other place. In the other hand, I also see there are many expats coming with their families, in some cases with children, with a set of recreational habits in somehow far from the single ones’, like in my case. Even so, I have to say that in all these years I met wonderful people in this family situation and I really enjoyed with them (although I tend to keep myself apart when the plan for Saturday is going to a theme park for children…).

Kuwait, apart from its planned for cars urban design, doesn’t offer too many activities and leisure places. I mean, it has nothing to do with Dubai, for example, although, if one explores well, it is always possible to find something interesting to do. Other related to leisure time factor is the absence of alcohol. For me it doesn’t mean any obstacle but I know people who don’t feel so comfortable socializing without having any alcohol around. However, this doesn’t mean that there are no pubs in Kuwait. I was once in one, where there were no spirits but shishas. If you are not bothered by the itchy eyes of the remaining smell on your clothes,, then it is not a bad place.

Despite all these circumstances, in the last weeks I have been meeting new people who I can arrange meetings and activities with, like running, now when the weather is very convenient. It is a question of time, that’s it, as in every part of the World, although here it is a bit more complicated. By the way, does anyone fancy a cup of coffee?

Abayas, dishdashas and other clothes

One of the most shocking and, at the same time, disturbing things to see when one arrives to Kuwait, or any other country in Persian Gulf, is the amount of women wearing completely in black, many of them showing only the eyes. This only reinforces the theory saying that we tend to perceive with more attention what matches with our previous expectations. This leads us sometimes to distort reality. Strangely enough, there are other women, at least in this country, who goes with uncovered hair, and some of them prefer wearing in western clothes (I have even seen some girls in bikini in a public pool). Few days ago I attended to a cultural conference about clothing in Kuwait and Arab countries in general, and we discussed about this and other related topics I will comment now.

The main traditional attire for women is called abaya. It is a long, floor length tunic, usually made in polyester or silk, in black colour. It is wore together with the hiyab or the cloak used by women to cover their heads and, sometimes, with the niqab, the veil which they cover their faces with, showing only the eyes. The reasons of why they use this clothing, with or without niqab, are merely religious and cultural, and it will depends on the degree of religiosity or traditionalism of each woman. That is to say, at least here in Kuwait, using abaya and covering head and face is not obligatory, although there are countries like Saudi Arabia where it is mandatory in all public places.

Continuing with the female attire, the abaya is not the only traditional clothing for women in Kuwait. There is another dress, also long but much more colorful called daara. It is used usually for special events, such as weddings and other celebrations, but also there are girls who wear this for going out. The daara can be in different colors and designs, and it is normally decorated with embroidery and filigrees.

About men clothing, the most traditional ones wear usually a long white tunic called dishdasha, with trousers in the same color. On the head they wear a kind of cloak, known as ghutra, which can be in different colors, mostly white or a design of red squares, resembling those typical Palestine scarfs. The ghutra is topped with a double twisted black cord, the agal, in order to keep the cloak in its place, without falling down.

Does it look good?

It was an interesting talk where we also discussed about other topics such as the situation of women in Kuwait, what I would like to talk in a future post. About this matter, I don’t consider negative nor degrading if a girl covers her head or even her face, as long as it is a personal decision and it is not an imposition. But, well, if we stop to think about in our own dressing habits, what is not an imposition? Are we really free to decide what we want to wear? We tend to think that Muslim women are slaves of their religious values but, are we, Western people, not also slaves of our fashions and trends?

Here is the debate in case someone would like to say something about.